So it's Tuesday morning and the sun is absolutely glorious, blazing in through my windows and warming my cockels as I write this. I woke in a good mood and I guess although I'm still relatively in a good mood I am slightly fucked off.
This isn't due to the fact that getting my children ready for school and out of the door in record time is one of the most stressful things a woman can experience, no. I got that shit down over the past few years, leetsauce. It isn't due to the fact that I am still coughing up a lung every 10 minutes due to the husband fetching home SARS off the god damn plane from his business trip. And it's not due to the fact that Vampire Diaries was yet again, not aired last week. It's none of those things....
Before I started this blog, I decided to throw myself out there in the sea of wisdom and start reading other bloggers. One in particular caught my eye. He's great. He's funny and charming and best of all can write clearly, concisely and is wickedly funny with it. www.youngmanbrown.com .. You should check him out, he's freaking hilarious. And so, whenever I see that he's updated his blog I'm in. Kettle on, feet up and ready for a funny read. He never disappoints.
Reading his latest post this morning I was referred to another blog. I won't advertise that blog here, the bitch has got right up my nose and I'll be screwed if I send any traffic her way, but let me just give you a quick account of her blog and the post that firstly made me miffed but then made me smile, smugly..
So she's late twenties and by her own admission is short. 5ft 3... and 'curvy' seems to be well educated. Her blog reads of one disasterous date after another. She details locations, what they ate and who said what. That's great, I'm sure most girlfriends like sharing that kind of info as they put their pj's on together with some Haagen Dazs and it's all gay and lovely and there's unicorns and daisies everywhere. Normal grown up chicks, they just grab beers and hang loose and recount with 'Yeah, it was just fail... so... Expendables 2 looks awesome right? Chuck is so kick ass' Nonetheless, I read this chick's blog. The offending post is a recount of a phone conversation she has when her ex calls her up. He needs advice. He's dating some new hawt chick, she wants to be a stripper, she get's a job as a stripper against his wishes and he's not sure what to do about this. Kudos to the dude for calling his ex on this subject matter, that was and is the only cool thing about that fucking post. Way to smack a bitch in the face but hey, Blogger chick got this covered. This convo cannot harm her, all the way up there on her pedestal....
Basically she gives him some lame advice. That's cool. I'd probably do the same just to get him off the phone but it's the fact that she makes fun of the fact that this girl wants or does infact now, work as a stripper. She has a few comments from readers also joining the bandwagon ridiculing this profession. Admittedly, as with every chosen profession in this world there is always a downside to pretty much every job. Unless it's Chief Taster for the abovementioned ice-cream Gods. Wait.. no.. there is a downside, you could become 'curvy' and have to rely on internet dating to get laid. Wha did I really just say that? *retracts claws* Oh, I forgot to mention.... Blogger chick's dates are infact through social media. Internet dating. Sounds safe in this day in age right? So anyway, they're kinda hating on the old stripper profession. It offends me. Who are you?
Let me get real with you Bloggerchick, let me get real with your poor close minded friends too. I was infact a stripper for many years. At the same time, I was also working professionaly as a legal secretary then further managing my own team in the emergency call room working alongside some of the finest police officers in the UK. I am well educated, I am smart, bright and sometimes a fast tongued little mare. I didn't strip solely for the money, not that it mattered if I did. I know plenty of girls who rely on this job as their primary source of income. But for me, it wasn't about the dollar. It was about how it made me feel, as a person, as a woman. It also showed me how close friends you can become with the other girls in that profession. They watch your six, they got your back more than any other mate you will make, it's a serious community and we band together to take care of one another, no matter the threat or issue. It's a beautiful thing to see and be a part of.
I've danced overseas. I've seen some beautiful places and I've met some of the most colourful and fun people known to man. Ok so I've met freaks and weirdos too but hey, they're everywhere and my current choice of profession back then had no bearing on meeting these people. The experience of dealing with all different walks of life and respecting their views and lifechoices is beneficial to a person, the experience of seeing some amazing sights in the world and feeling a part of something is beneficial to a person, the self confidence boost this job can give you when you're lying face down in the foetal position is beneficial to a person and I'd be a lying little minx if I didn't say that the ridiculous amount of money you make is, ofcourse, beneficial to a person. Read that back. All good points. That job enriched my life. I experienced many things I wouldn't have normally. And best of it all? I called the shots. I decided when I worked, who for, how long and for how much. Oh I must add here too, although it should be fairly obvious, it gives you a killer body and keeps you healthy and fit. Does Bloggerchick and her cronies still wanna be hating? I guess so... but they're not hating out of ignorance. They're hating out of jealousy.
You see, my mood swiftly turned from 'Oh really man?' to 'Ya, really Bish' because I realised that it's not her fault that she laughs at this profession, or finds some comedic value in it. Why? Well I don't know about you but when I'm slightly jealous of something my first initial reaction is to ridicule it. Like a defence mechanism. I can't honestly be mad at her really, for using this tact. As I said, she herself describes herself as short and 'curvy, she further relies on the interwebz to score dates and each of her list of dates are all fail, some resulting in her actually paying for her own damn meal... stands to reason she'd hate on other girls who infact do not have those issues. Instead of passing your judgy little eyes over some of the hardest, coolest and most fun working girls out there in this world Bloggerchick, how's about you take a little look at yourself. People in glass houses and all that...
To my homegirls back in the UK, keep shaking your asses til you've had enough fun with it. Let little stories like this fuel you to give the hoity toity Olivia Newtwon-Johns of this world a big fuck you. They see you rollin' girls, they hating. Let them. They be mad, they can't get laid, can't get dates and defo can't afford those Jimmy Choos that are just too damn sexy. Yeah, I see how much fun it must be to live like Bloggerchick, but God knows, I bet it's lonely as fuck up there on your moral throne huh my friend? Nevermind though, tis not to worry. When you eventually fall from grace don't worry, we're nice girls, we'll pick you up, dust you down.... then show your current boyfriend how a real chick takes care of her man.... but we'll totally watch your six :)
I'm out, have an epic day :)
Raven xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment